The Benefits of a Good Friendship
Did you know that high quality friendships are good for our mental health? Research has found that adult friendships result in overall well-being by promoting companionship and support (Khullar et al., 2021). In young adults, strong friendships also translate to improved academic outcomes and emotional adjustment in university (Khullar et al., 2021).
When examining specific factors that result in a healthy friendship, researchers have identified several signs to look out for:
Emotional Support – Do you feel accepted, supported, validated and safe in your friendship? When spending time with friends, they should be a source of encouragement, empathy and trust.
Informational Support – Are your friends able to offer you with good advice or guidance in challenging situations? Do they provide you with beneficial information that can be applied to various situations?
Emotional Security – When faced with a stressful situation, do your friends offer support, comfort and safety? Research has found that good friends act as a buffer during challenging situations, helping to alleviate feelings of stress and anxiety.
Reliability – Can you count on your friends to be there for you when needed? Do you feel they are loyal to you?
Self-Validation – Do they promote/encourage your own self-esteem? It is imperative that friends strengthen our self-worth, not reduce it.
Self-Disclosure – Do your friends share their own struggles with you? Sharing sensitive information/challenging topics should be reciprocal in friendships, not one-sided.
In addition to these signs of a healthy friendship, it is also important to consider the benefits of friendship. Researchers have found that good friends alter our stress response. By talking to a supportive friend about a stressful/challenging situation, this can lower our blood pressure. Additionally, having a friend nearby when completing a challenging task results in lower heartrates than doing the same task alone (Holt et al., 2007). Furthermore, friends increase our motivation. Oftentimes, friends share similar values, leading them to share similar perspectives regarding motivation, rewards and identity.
It is important to note that the quantity of friendships is not as important as its quality. Studies have found that most people have three close friends and other more casual friends or acquaintances. These close relationships play an instrumental role in our own personal development and feelings of security. For example, friends help provide meaning to our lives, increasing positive emotions and strengthening our sense of purpose.
By creating a small network of friends, this strengthens our feelings of safety, validation, confidence and overall security in ourselves. Based on this information, take some time today and reflect on the friendships in your own life. Who are you thankful for?
References:
Holt-Lunstad, J., Uchino, B., Smith,T., Hicks, A. (2007) On the importance of relationship quality: The impact of ambivalence in friendships on cardiovascular functioning, Annals of Behavioral Medicine, 33(3) 278–290, https://doi.org/10.1007/BF02879910
Khullar, T. H., Kirmayer, M. H., & Dirks, M. A. (2021). Relationship dissolution in the friendships of emerging adults: How, when, and why?. Journal of social and personal relationships, 38(11), 3243–3264. https://doi.org/10.1177/02654075211026015
Pezirkianidis, C., Galanaki, E., Raftopoulou, G., Moraitou, D., & Stalikas, A. (2023). Adult friendship and wellbeing: A systematic review with practical implications. Frontiers in psychology, 14, 1059057. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1059057
https://www.apa.org/monitor/2023/06/cover-story-science-friendship